Exam

Wake at 10.30am in Archway when non-flatmate James jumps on self. Have spent night on couch after long evening of drinking, debauchery and other D-words as old friend Tim has returned from Paris. James-made coffee and self-made cigarette put mind in better focus but remain deliriously tired and am thrown by lack of natural light in James' dungeon. Last time self in Archway had watched The Player. This visitation no where near as productive. Discuss with James possibility of midnight screening of Werner Herzog film Bad Lieutenant. Decide to leave as know that email from Theodora waiting in inbox and phone battery requires resuscitation.

Arrive home and sink into quilt cover. Wake at 4pm feeling ashamed. Drag self to work. Go for pre-arranged sparkling wine meet with flatmate Tom's girlfriend Georgia in Somerset House. Am harassed by Georgia about mention of her in self's blog. Mind races back to few nights previously when self was harassed in text form by nineteen year old drinking partner Louise. Situation curtailed in similar fashion both times, but secretly thinking during curtailment that self pleased with number of followers.

Meet up with both flatmates and non-flatmate Northerner Martin. Martin makes ingenious pun regarding Korea and night put swiftly to bed as painfully obvious nothing better will be said by anyone. Walk home with tired and bruised flatmate Johnny. Decide that moment unripe for gay-for-pay suggestion that self learnt from Humpday.

Night still relatively young so begin watching Exam. Know that film set in single room and self obsessed with films set in rooms, cubes, or in case of upcoming Ryan Reynolds film, coffins. Have downloaded film after failure to appropriate copy of mathematics-based horror film Fermat's Room. Disappointed when everyone in film starts speaking and realise that film set in England.

Concept fairly ridiculous to begin with and only gets worse. But all set in one room so don't care and fearlessly enjoy narrative progression. Try to recall if ever single sheet of A4 plain paper has been used for such narrative effect before. Decide that foremost example must be black and white film Letter From an Unknown Woman, although paper not A4. Complete Exam around 1.30am and decide to grade it as C. Drift into coma and hope self not woken following morning with physical violence.